I know, I don't know.

I don't know a thing. Or maybe I do, I don't know really. I'm sitting there in a corner, sulking...sobbing over what once was or maybe over what I wanted so badly to happen...each tear gliding down my cheeks and getting lost in the creases of my sweatshirt. I want it to rain so badly. I want it to rain cats and dogs, bulls and buffaloes, chickens and roosters. I want everything to be drenched, soaked and so completely wet. Why? I swear, I don't know why. I want strong winds to blow outside my window, so that the peaceful looking leaves stop sticking their tongues out at me and my restless soul, so that they too get a taste of the storm. I want the sky to turn a very dark purple, the stars to twinkle so bright like little diamonds studded in the night, I want the clouds to let it all out tonight. There's so much more that I want, but I just don't know. I want to arrange shards of broken glass in concentric circles and walk all over, starting from the outermost circle inwards...the crunch of the glass under my bare feet echoes in my ears, the pain is too familiar to feel anymore...I walk, leaving trails of crimson behind me...I hold out a candle in the palm of my hand and as the wax melts down into my skin, I don't feel a thing. I don't know why. It's probably because heat can't compete with the fumes that reside within me. I walk and walk until I reach the center, where I stand alone, staring out into nothingness. Things are too bright. They hurt my eyes. I don't know why. I try to shield my eyes using my arms...the candle falls from my hand...it all starts from a flame...the next thing I know is that I'm standing in a hoop of fiery flames. It feels so much like home. So much warmth, so much love, such a fiery embrace...the flames come closer and closer, enveloping me from all sides. I welcome them with open arms. Trust me, I don't know why. Amidst the flames, I see a face. It's yours I think. I smile. My eyes twinkle, not with glow, but with the waters pushing to come out. But tears don't fall. I don't know why. Maybe because they know there's no point in trying to diminish my family of flames. What are you? A mirage? Illusion? Hallucination? Thoughts of a crazy mind? A hoax by the wind? I really don't know. But I know just one thing, you are 'someone'.