F.A.D.E

I listened to Backstreet Boys after ages today. Songs like "Show me the meaning" and "Everybody" brought back so many memories of the days when we kids were just getting acquainted with the "gorafied" side of music. We were leaving behind songs such as "Dil Dil Pakistan", "Jazba Junoon" far behind to explore other realms :P Ah, Iqraa, Faiza, Basit, Haseeb and yours truly, what a time it was! Walking backwards down the memory lane is a very frequent activity of mine. I'm always taking mental vacations back to the times when big things seemed so small and small things seemed too big to handle. But alhamdullilah, it's all good. I have no regrets, that in itself is a major blessing. I seriously miss the times when I had the time to sit down and reflect thoroughly. Now it's just as if I have to force myself to stop and my reflective abilities come up in "spurt and squirt" format. It's funny and very annoying at the same time. I just felt like ranting today, hence the blog entry.

Today's June 11. Exactly a year ago, I was bidding farewell to my school, embracing Mrs. Sindhu and Dr. Riad, consoling them that I'd keep in touch. The day my dad cried because his daughter was leaving one phase of life to enter the next. The day I had felt that I was leaving behind a heavy dose of tranquilizers to face life with all its rough edges and hues. Part of me longed to stay, while another wanted to breakaway and break the decade of monotony and "sameness". I was in a potpourri of doubt and emotion. Looking back, I often want to laugh at myself. Actually, I don't know what I want to do about myself. Sometimes, I feel that I fused myself out and that I'd eventually get whatever was destined for me anyways even if I hadn't burned my calories, flexed my neurons and sacrifised my physical and emotional immunity over things. But I guess it becomes very easy to say this once you have everything resting on the palm of your hand. Such philosophies miserably fail when you stand empty-handed in a line waiting to fed by the barren outcomes of your dreams...

June 11, 2009.
What a day?
a) Weird people in hospital premises! :P Right Sehr and Sahla? "Tropicana"
b) Glasses!
c) Dupatta fiascoes!
d) Bakris.
e) Punjabi lessons.
f) The heat.
g) Skipping lunch.

yada yada yada.


PS: FADE: For A Day so Exceptional. =]